Are They Serious About You?

When things are going great in a relationship, it's often too easy to make the assumption that things are getting serious. If you both get along well with each other, have fun while you are doing it, and the attraction factor is so intense you can't keep your hands off of one another ... things must be getting serious, right? Not necessarily.


So how do you tell if he is serious about you and your relationship? Ask yourself the following questions and find out.


1. Does he often initiate plans to get together? If you are the one who usually initiates getting together, he is on your mind more often than you are on his. A couple who is serious about one another will roughly be evenly split as to who asks who out. They will also both suggest activities and places to go together.


2. Do you get together during the week, or is it just Friday or Saturday night? If he wants to get together only on the weekends, especially only on Friday and Saturday, he may be more interested in the fun part of the relationship. He may not want the responsibility of being with someone more than that. In other words, those weekend get togethers are more like booty calls.


3. Have you been introduced to the people he considers are important to him in his life? If he has introduced you to his close friends or, even better, his family, then you are climbing higher on his list of priorities. If he wasn't proud of you and the relationship the two of you share, he wouldn't be proud to introduce you to his inner social circle.


4. Do you generally know what he is doing throughout the week? If he offers to fill you in on his daily life and what he is planning to do in the upcoming week, then you are someone he wants to let in on his life. This is especially true if he volunteers the information before you even ask him about his plans.


5. Does he ask for your advice with issues that are important to him? If he asks your opinion about a problem he is having with a close friend, if he discusses an issue his brother is dealing with, or a challenge he is encountering at work, then ... bingo! You are definitely in his inner circle of confidants and that means he is (or is getting) serious about you and your relationship.


6. Does he talk about your future and what your life plan is? Does he ask you whether you want marriage or children in your future? Is he interested in your career and your plans on where you want to be in 5 or 10 years' time? Does he want to know where you want to live in the long term (what city, near or far away from your family)? If he asks these types of questions, he is thinking about his future and whether your life plans will mesh well with his. If he is starting to envision the two of you together in the future, he is serious about you in a big way.


Not everyone is looking for a longterm dating partner. And that's o.k..


You can't be angry at your guy if he is looking for a relationship that requires little or no future commitment. His lack of commitment is not a reflection on you. It is just that he is at a different stage in his life than you are in yours. And that, unfortunately, is something you can't change.


But if you are looking for something more, it's good to know the signs that will tell you if he is serious about you or not, so you can decide whether to stay, or go, with open eyes.